It's been long since I posted here. My mother in law was here for a month and a half, and that left me with little time to my own. She is leaving to go back to India today. Almost a fortnight back, I wrote a draft full of complaints about how tough it is to live with the MIL, but never published it. So it came as a shock and surprise to me when I cried both last night and this morning because she is leaving. Yes, it's tough to live with any new person. Yes, having the MIL around can make you feel like you're under scrutiny like nothing else can. And yes, when you like your space and quiet, it can be stressful to have a house full of people creating havoc. And yet, today it hit me that she is leaving, and when I come back home from work tonight, there will be nobody to welcome me with a smile and "eat this, I made this for you". My brother-in-law who lives in our city but hardly visits was also staying with us as MIL was here. He will go back home too. There will be no one to tease me and pull my leg and laugh at me.
As much as the thought of my house in a constant state of mess and lack of privacy annoyed me, now I don't want either if it means, there's no family around. I don't think any one's perfect. But I cannot thank the million lucky stars in my favor enough, for giving me such a caring, joyful, patient and understanding MIL. My in-laws love me, care for me almost more than M does.
It's such a shocking realization to think that my perspective transformed from annoyed to amazed in only 45 days. I have been living on my own and away from family for a decade now and I had forgotten how enriching it is to live surrounded by people who love you, care for you no matter what. A group of different personalities who fight and have arguments, but when sit down to have dinner together, tell hilarious and embarrassing stories about each other, forgetting all the differences.
I think what I appreciate the most about having parents (mine or in-laws) living with us is, even if I am handling everything like I always do, I still feel like there's someone watching over me, someone who I can go crying to when I screw up, someone who is capable of taking care of me cos of their lifelong experience being a parent, someone who can tell me "It will get better" in a confident and comforting tone, that only parents possess, someone whom I can pass the buck to. Takes the edge off of everything, doesn't it?
I think this strip from Calvin & Hobbes, captures this sentiment exactly -
To all who live with or close to your families, I am so jealous! Hopefully someday soon, I will be one of you!
Amen.
As much as the thought of my house in a constant state of mess and lack of privacy annoyed me, now I don't want either if it means, there's no family around. I don't think any one's perfect. But I cannot thank the million lucky stars in my favor enough, for giving me such a caring, joyful, patient and understanding MIL. My in-laws love me, care for me almost more than M does.
It's such a shocking realization to think that my perspective transformed from annoyed to amazed in only 45 days. I have been living on my own and away from family for a decade now and I had forgotten how enriching it is to live surrounded by people who love you, care for you no matter what. A group of different personalities who fight and have arguments, but when sit down to have dinner together, tell hilarious and embarrassing stories about each other, forgetting all the differences.
I think what I appreciate the most about having parents (mine or in-laws) living with us is, even if I am handling everything like I always do, I still feel like there's someone watching over me, someone who I can go crying to when I screw up, someone who is capable of taking care of me cos of their lifelong experience being a parent, someone who can tell me "It will get better" in a confident and comforting tone, that only parents possess, someone whom I can pass the buck to. Takes the edge off of everything, doesn't it?
I think this strip from Calvin & Hobbes, captures this sentiment exactly -
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To all who live with or close to your families, I am so jealous! Hopefully someday soon, I will be one of you!
Amen.
