Breathe and re-boot

Sometimes life tends to be at a standstill. At such times, I try to keep it moving. And sometimes, it moves so fast, there's only enough time to breathe and run with it. What was I up to for so long? Just trying to breathe and run as fast as I could. And then I realized, I may never stop running long enough to write a post, or two. So here I am, running and writing and breathing and attempting to re-boot my blog.

Now that I have the philo-crapo-sophy out of my system, let's talk about what I have been up to? Lets see? Bullet points?

• Started a new job more than a year ago, roughly around the time I took a break from writing. Blinked and realized, more than a year has gone by.
• Got married. 
• Almost closing in the first year of my marriage. (Side note - It's not as easy as people make it seem)
• Took a trip to Hawaii (Highlight of my year, definitely. It really is heaven on earth. Post on that, soon)
• Took my parents to NYC, Washington DC, Niagara Falls. (Me = Proud)
• Took my parents-in-law to San Fran. (Love that city)
• I grew up. No really. I did. How you ask? (Ok nobody really did, but I will tell you anyway) - I manage a household by myself now (with help from M). And no, it's not always smooth sailing. I "decorate" and do "nesting" stuff, like clean, re-arrange furniture, hang wall art etc. I have started to learn to try to manage my money. 

Of course, there are so many details that I am leaving out, so as to not bore any of my fans out there. I know you guys have been holding thy breath everyday! You can relax now, this blog will probably survive. I hope. (Who am I kidding? IS ANYONE STILL HERE?? *holds her breath, and waits for a comment*)

And here's a picture from Hawaii. To make this post interesting.

Profound thought for the day!

And you bettah hear me cuz it don't hit me everyday sistah!

Ok so now that that's out of my system. Phew. Anyway, it hit me in the shower, just like all great ideas do...based on my day today - You cannot keep waiting for the right moment to take the plunge. Like you cannot keep saying I am going to do it(whatever it is that you want to do) when I have a new house, enough money, more friends etc.You just have to go ahead and do it. Take the plunge. Dive into it. Immerse yourself. You know, get the picture? And no I'm not talking about swimming here. (Gotcha!)

And yes, I know what you're thinking (I can read minds). This? I already know this? What's new in that? Well I'll tell you what's new. Nothing really. I just wanted to remind everyone who reads this today/tonight.
Go. For. It. No matter how big or small .

(Although I would suggest start with small. Also this blog and it's author are in  no way responsible for the ill consequences of this advice, even though we are open to receiving gratitude. In cash.)

Seriously. Do it. Also, here are some steps on how to "go for it" -
Step 1: Figure out what it is that you want to go for.
Step 2: Think of consequences that might affect this blog or it's author.
Step 3: If there's anything that you thought of in step 2, goto Step 1.Else goto Step 4.
Step 4: Go for it.

If you want more redundant algorithms on how to go for it, please contact the author. (It will cost you.)

Later!

PS: Seriously, Go for it! :)

Getting older, dreams, wedding...Life!

I had a funny lil dream last night. I was at my engineering college reunion. There were boys there too somehow, even though my college is all-girls. But that's not the point. The point is, all girls were crying cos one of my friends (who is now married for 2 years) wrote a speech about how difficult life is after marriage. And of course I missed the speech, since I reached there late (I reach late most of the places, it's a disease, I'm a victim!), but got this gist when I reached. In my dream.

I woke up laughing. But obviously I had to dissect it under a microscope. Why did I get this dream? Why? Is it because I am scared of getting married? Maybe. See I am not even sure where I am going with this information here. But I guess I just wanted to put it out there. In case someone knows a cure. And while you're at it, I would also like to know how to get it up for my own wedding stuff like - mehendi, make-up, jewellery, saris.

On an aside, these days I keep thinking about how old I am getting(25!). And how it's changing me. Just the other day I was looking into the mirror and getting the famous "I'm so ugly" syndrome. But soon enough I checked myself. I reminded myself that i am 25 and not 16 anymore. I need to be more confident and comfortable with myself. Obviously this pep-talk didn't help for long. But something else did. I saw news, and saw how terrible a situation it is in Haiti. And then I couldn't help but feel lucky and surprisingly got over my syndrome in a minute. If I was 16, this wouldn't have happened. So yea, maybe being 25 gives you flabby mid-rif (or is it - sitting and doing nothing), but it also gives you wisdom. For which I am so thankful! Life's good!

Can't stay away for long!

I am getting this itch to write something, and my empty head gives me nothing to write (unless you want to hear me crib some more? No, right. See how well I know you!).

So this interesting tag I picked up from Rani.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
Well, it has happened more than once. First time I couldn't get over it. The next time, I just said - Shit happens. And I moved on.

2. If you can have a dream come true, what would it be?
Find a job that I love. Buy an apartment for aai-baba. Own entire closet(s) for shoes, and have enough money to buy all kinds of shoes!!!

3. Whose butt would you like to kick?
There are too many people to list here!

4. What would do with a billion dollars?
Stop looking for job. Start apartment hunting for mom dad. Go shoe-shopping, all around the world! yaay!

5. Would you fall in love with your best friend?
I did. The trouble was he didn't ;) But I would say - you can't really know if you want to be with someone you "date" them.

6. Which is more blessed: loving someone or being loved by someone?
Both, ideally. Being loved the way you want to be loved, and loving someone the way they want to be loved is a rare find though.

7. How long would you wait for someone you love?
I can't wait. I am very impatient.

8. If the person you secretly like is attached, what will you do?
Well. Forget about him. Delete him from my orkut, facebook and my life. Life's too short!

9. If you could root for one social cause, what would it be?
Education.

10. What takes you down the fastest?
Ummm. I am sure as hell not disclosing that! :)

11. Where do you see yourself in 10 years time?
Tricky question. But one thing I know - I want to be with M after 10 yrs too. It would be interesting to see what new quirks he develops and what happens to the ones present right now!

12. What’s your fear?
Of losing my close ones.

13. Would you rather be single and rich or married and poor?
almost-to-be-married-single & poor-turned-overnight-rich?

14. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously who will you pick?
Someone who can love me back. Yes, I am selfish that way.

15. Would you give all in a relationship?
Give all. Take all.

16. Would you forgive and forget someone no matter how horrible a thing he has done?
Still trying to. Just as someone else somewhere might be trying to do the same for me.

17. Do you prefer being single or in a relationship?
Single. No, in a relationship. No wait - single. Naaa - relationship. Ooops - Didn't mean to tell you'll my biography!

So who wants to do this one? M - obviously you. Avanti you? (whenever you find time)

Okay. Can't think of nemore bakras! :) Whoever else wants, would love to read your answers... muhuhahahahahaha

Sayonara.

It's surprisingly accurate!

Though I haven't watched the movie....the short description sounds quite correct.....

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

An excerpt from..

...something I had to read for this presentation...
"Hindsight can sometimes see the past clearly—with 20/20 vision. But the path of what happened is so brightly lit that it places everything else more deeply into shadow.."

Read this...

...in the gym, while on stepper. Yes, yes, I am finally facing the truth that the extra cushion under my skin which so comforting to sleep in, especially if you are sleeping on a sleeping bag every night, is not so comforting to the eyes, or the clothes, which are now ready to burst at seams and scream "Horror!!", at being tortured by forcing my chubby self into them size 2 clothes, where yours truly is now somewhere between 4 and 6. (Actually 6, but latest shopping has seen me in denial and buying only size 4 clothes which at least spells healthy rather than huge.)

Anyway, it made a good read and also enabled me to work those 5 min more and lose another 20 calories to hit 200!

The Top 20 Things Oprah Knows for Sure

Since the day the late Gene Siskel asked me, "What do you know for sure?" and I got all flustered and started stuttering and couldn't come up with an answer, I've never stopped asking myself that question. And every month I must find yet another answer. Some months I feel I hardly know a thing, and I'm always pressed to make the deadline for this column. This time around, in honor of our tribute to the subject, I looked back and came up with my all-time top 20:

1. What you put out comes back all the time, no matter what. (This is my creed.)

2. You define your own life. Don't let other people write your script.

3. Whatever someone did to you in the past has no power over the present. Only you give it power.

4. When people show you who they are, believe them the first time. (A lesson from Maya Angelou.)

5. Worrying is wasted time. Use the same energy for doing something about whatever worries you.

6. What you believe has more power than what you dream or wish or hope for. You become what you believe.

7. If the only prayer you ever say is thank you, that will be enough. (From the German theologian and humanist Meister Eckhart.)

8. The happiness you feel is in direct proportion to the love you give.

9. Failure is a signpost to turn you in another direction.

10. If you make a choice that goes against what everyone else thinks, the world will not fall apart.

11. Trust your instincts. Intuition doesn't lie.

12. Love yourself and then learn to extend that love to others in every encounter.

13. Let passion drive your profession.

14. Find a way to get paid for doing what you love. Then every paycheck will be a bonus.

15. Love doesn't hurt. It feels really good.

16. Every day brings a chance to start over.

17. Being a mother is the hardest job on earth. Women everywhere must declare it so.

18. Doubt means don't. Don't move. Don't answer. Don't rush forward.

19. When you don't know what to do, get still. The answer will come.

20. "Trouble don't last always." (A line from a Negro spiritual, which calls to mind another favorite: This, too, shall pass.)

So thanks, Gene, for asking me the question. The answer continues…

You can find the article here.

Few realizations of late!

- Carpe diem. Seize the day. Seize the moment. This moment, this time will never come in your life again. Be the moment sad or happy, live it to the fullest, you may never get a chance to feel it again!

- Always do what you want. You can never be happy doing something that others want you to do. Doing what you want will make you happy.

- Say 'No' if you want to. It's prfectly OK to say no. There's never a reason to feel guilty in exercising the right of saying no.

- Do not let others walk all over you. Ever. No matter who they are.

- Just go with the flow in life. Stop thinking or worrying about future. It NEVER helps.

Real Life or Fairy Tale?

I had a dream last night. I dreamt that I was given a choice. A choice of living in the fairy tale or real life. I don’t remember what I chose. But when I woke up I was very confused. What would I choose? What would anyone choose? I discussed this with my friends. One of them agreed with me, that the real life is too real sometimes. Sometimes we need those fairy tale moments just to reinforce our beliefs. But given a choice would we choose to abandon the real world and go live in a fairy tale? A place where there are difficulties to overcome, battles to be fought, combination of good and bad people to deal with; just like our world. But there’s also an end to it all. There’s also the magic potion, the handsome prince charming, and the funny friend always standing by your side! And most importantly there is ALWAYS “a happily ever after”. And there I thought I had my answer. Obviously yes!

But somewhere inside, I was not satisfied. It’s the damned beliefs I tell ya! Even though here, it was the belief in my own world. Despite that I come to hate it so much sometimes, the fact that it was my own to hate, was not allowing me to let go of it so easily, even in my post, even fictionally! I wondered why it was so difficult to accept an easy choice? Because we are trained to distrust the easier options? Or was there some other catch? I kept thinking, not just for hours, but for a good couple of days (wow, I really must care after all, think of all the time I spent thinking for the world I don’t even like most of the times!!). And then like a brick it hit me right in the head! ‘Seeing stars in broad daylight’ excluded (Sorry to disappoint you all!). The catch is – A fairy tale is good for only one person, the main character! It’s nice and happy in the end only for the Snow Whites, the Cinderellas, and the Shreks. What if, you are one of the dwarfs, or the ugly sister, or god forbid the Donkey!! And that’s the best thing about real world. We may not have magic potions, but we do have support of our family and friends which gives more strength than any magic potion. We may still have to deal with good and bad people and have battles to fight, but we know it’s all manageable. And there is no single happy ending, but there are many happy pauses, which work just as well, sometimes even better! And most importantly, in real life, you are the main character, the hero, the star of your story! For better or for worse!

Sayonara!

I changed my mind...

Some days back I wrote this. But I have changed my mind now. I judged people whom I had met that day, not on that day of course(that's why I wrote that, I'm not as crazy as you think I am); but after more interactions with them. Unfortunately, my experience did not turn out that great. And let me tell you this -

• It's not easy to be nice to people who have been not nice to you before.
• Its very difficult not to get nasty thoughts like - Why should I help him now? He didn't help me when I needed him to!!
  
• Even if you don't act maliciously, and do help them after all, you cant help thinking - now you've come to me!! NOW...you need me.
• And lastly you end up feeling guilty about thinking all such stuff!

So anyways...what I think now is, there is hardly any other way but not to judge people. I think we humans wouldn't be us (you know the whole crap about us being the finer species with acute brain power n blah blah blah) without the judging bit inside us.

So I think we can be okay about it not feel guilty about it :)
Atleast that's what I will follow...because I have also learnt that it is this very trait that leads you to form the best of relations with those whom you judged wrong first. :)

Sayonara!

How true!

It hurts to find out that what you wanted doesn't match what you dreamed it would be.

Questions!

These questions keep haunting me - what is love really? What is betrayal? Who defines what is that thin line between cheating and not cheating? Or does it just depend on your gut feeling? What do you do when you see yourself being exploited mentally, and see that the culprit has a clean conscience? What is over-reaction, really? Who defines it?
Does anybody have answers to these?

Sometimes I feel whatever is happening is all my fault! Sometimes I feel that, it is not so...
I don't think it's my fault. I will not let myself take the blame.

On a different and a happier note....I am still able to blog..Yaaaaay!!
Gawd..I have no idea what I'll do without it?!!
Here I can say whatever's bothering me, without worrying that it is going to judge me, advice me (sometimes I just need to let my heart out, w/o being consoled, told right from wrong etc.), or do anything!

Sayonara!

Ignorance is bliss!

That is soooo true! Sometimes you are better off going till the end, not knowing a lot of "facts". I think our life is more of what we imagine it in our head to be, rather than what it really is. And I think it's better to go on in that if you are happy, rather than knowing the truth(which most of the times does absolutely nothing more than imparting hurt & pain & disillusionment & disappointment) cos even after knowing it, there's not much that you can do about it!

So come to think of it - two people who seem to be living together, are actually living in two different worlds which exist in their minds. And now just increase the count to three, four, millions! This world is actually a collection of tiny little worlds which are intertwined with each other. And each of us has many lives simultaneously, that we lead in our mind, as well as in others'.

Okay I don know anymore what I am talking about! :D

Sayonara!