Gentlemen who golf

"She figured out early what every man with a corner office has long known: To make it to the top, you need a wife. If that wife happens to be a husband, and increasingly it is, so be it."

"Seven of the 18 women who are currently CEOs of Fortune 500 companies—including Xerox’s (XRX) Ursula Burns, PepsiCo’s (PEP) Indra Nooyi, and WellPoint’s (WLP) Angela Braly—have, or at some point have had, a stay-at-home husband."

"At-home dads are sometimes perceived as freeloaders, even if they’ve lost jobs. Or they’re considered frivolous kept men—gentlemen who golf."

Says this article. Although it may, on the surface look like a good way of repentance for men, the question begs to be asked - Isn't this creating the same problem all over again, but this time with men? Won't there be a generation of men, sometime in the future, struggling to find their feet in the woman's world, while trying to manage household stuff at the same time. And even though at some level, my evil self would love to see it happen, to be completely fair - it's not fair. Is it not possible for both spouses to have a high-flying career AND a life AND a family? Is that really too much to ask?

I think what needs to happen, and what is slowly but surely taking place is, both need to own equal parts of the responsibility of earning the moolah, but also taking care of family and home. If that is not possible or feasible, then something about our attitude needs to change that makes the person who stays at home feel like this - 

"Caring for children all day and doing housework is tiring, unappreciated work that few are cut out for—and it leaves men and women alike feeling isolated and diminished."

Staying at home and taking care of children, is also what my mother did, and I respect and appreciate her for that. That is an important job, important enough to leave a job that pays, and it deserves it's due respect. But what is that change that needs to be made to make the person (man or woman) who now does a full time job of caring for home with no weekends, or paid vacation, feel the significance that they deserve?

Thoughts?

Taking stock

I made a list of things to accomplish in my 10 day holiday, (which is now very very sadly coming to an end) and I want to thank the blogosphere, cos if it weren't for the fear of losing face in front of the blog world, I wouldn't have done even one of these. But I am proud to say that I was able to cross off a lot in this list. Let's see shall we?

1. Sew the button on M's jacket, fix the zipper on it too
It took me only 8 months and 15 minutes to finally do this!

2. Find and install a "devghar"
I was hoping to go to Target and get a small shelf to hang under the kitchen cupboards, but that never happened!

3. Buy a new mattress
Went to ikea and bought one, and also a new comforter (and a bunch of other stuff ;))

4. Finally donate the stack of books set aside to be donated a few months ago
Hopefully soon!

5. Finish painting letter 'S' and hang it somewhere
This too!

6. Figure out a way to DIY frames for inspirational cards I've been collecting, and find a place to hang them
Bought frames from ikea, cos they are so darn cheap there, and hung them too. The cards say - "Be Colorful", "It's a world of possibilities" and "Be Bright". All of these are marketing cards from AT&T, Vera Bradley, that I have been saving to frame and hang some inspiration around the home! I finally decided to hang them in the bedroom over the drawers.

This last one was a greeting card of some sort. It has Ganesha face on it, that I hung in kitchen! :)

7. Vaccum the entire house (yes, it's been a couple of weeks since I did that :( )
Done!

8. Craiglist some extra furniture lying around the house
Now just waiting for buyers to pour in!

9. Sleep a lot
I kind of went above and beyond on this one ;)


10. Go to the library and borrow some books and finish reading them
I cheated on this a lil bit, I borrowed from the digital libary, so didn't technically "go" anywhere and still reading the books -

11. Hang a clock in every room
I tried to do this one, and could not find the spare clocks I thought I had :(


12. Watch episodes of "The Dewarists"
I was too busy doing number 9 most of the time, never got to this one..haha


I did some other stuff too, that was not on my list - 
- Threw a New Year's Eve party at my place complete with the decorations and party hats!
- Made a photo wall for "the year that was" as a tribute to the first year of my marriage that ended yesterday (the first year, not the marriage). Yes, my anniversary is on January 1st. There are photos for each month signifying what we did that month. Everyone was really amused with it in the party!

- Celebrated my anniversary, by going to a nice Moroccan restaurant where we enjoyed - delicious food, some awkward moments cos a belly dancer came and danced at each table (mostly on my part, M & the dancer seemed very comfortable) and some mind-blowing music! We also went to a fondue place to enjoy some molten chocolate dipped goodies! During the day we enjoyed a 3-hour Siesta after partying till late the previous night! 
Sidenote - When I told one of my friends, she seemed disappointed with how we spent our day. I asked her, what did you think we would do, bunjee-jumping, and she said yea, something more exciting than dinner. Ahhh, the naivety of being single ;)
This is us, ready to go out and have fun - 

And here's the amazing belly dancer teaching me some moves - 

That's all from me to account for the holidays and the new year. All in all, I think they were very well spent! How was the new year's eve and the new year for you?

Happy New Year!

I did not want to make any resolutions this year. They don't last for me. I make lists and forget about them. Remember I made the list of things to do in the 10 days holiday. I haven't done even half of them! But I did do some other things, so why bother making more lists to not stick to. Instead I only have a few wishes!

Here's to a healthy and happy year! Have fun guys, see you next year!

I want to remember every moment

Dear Husband,

I want to remember every moment of my life with you. I probably won't. I will probably only remember the special few, but I don't want to forget yesterday evening's everydayness, that I keep wanting to go back to.

You did not want me to drive to work, cos I was not feeling well. You thought I wouldn't be able to drive back. I wasn't so sure myself. I went anyway, and when I reached work I knew I wasn't feeling up to driving back in the evening. I asked you to take a train, 20 miles outside the city to come meet me and drive us both home. You said yes, without a moment's hesitation. And we had the best time. We went to your favorite Indian Restaurant. I like the food there, but the service always manages to drive me nuts. As it did yesterday, when the waiter told us we were ordering too much food for two people - Mirchi Bhajji, Uttapam, Daal Tadka, Goat Biryani, and Lassi. Okay, I agree, it was too much food, it always is. But I don't like to be told that. But you did not even care, and we got into our usual discussion about who is right - me or you! The restaurant was playing old hindi songs on the TV and we watched them together, sitting on the same side of the table. Me singing along the songs and you saying things that I did not know how to respond to, so I just sat there amused.

We had useless discussions about work, what kind of people are good dancers, gossiped about our family, and friends. It was hilarious. I had the best time. The drive that seems to go on forever everyday, got over too soon with you. And I am afraid, our life will pass me by too quickly in your company, and I won't even notice. Well, I guess that's the whole point. But at least I know I will have a good time. Life will keep throwing curveballs, and we will keep going through ups and downs. And, I am glad I will have you by my side, through everything. And I know you will always be there to drive me home.

Love,
Just same ol' me

The Eternal Optimist

Inspired by this post I decided to make a list of my own. Digression - Did I tell you I have a 10 day holiday coming up between Christmas and New Year's? End of Digression. Yes. Are you jealous? Don't be. I will tell you in a minute why you shouldn't be jealous. M does not get those days off, so we can't really go anywhere. I was trying to plan a trip with a friend, who does get those days off, but we never ended up planning anything. So, basically I have a 10 day holiday with nowhere to go. I refuse to add "and with nothing to do", to the statement. What does that leave me with - things to do. Yes. Things, that I have been putting off for months, must get done. Here we go -

1. Sew the button on M's jacket, fix the zipper on it too.
2. Find and install a "devghar"
3. Buy a new mattress
4. Finally donate the stack of books set aside to be donated a few months ago
5. Finish painting letter 'S' and hang it somewhere
6. Figure out a way to DIY frames for inspirational cards I've been collecting, and find a place to hang them
7. Vaccum the entire house (yes, it's been a couple of weeks since I did that :( )
8. Craiglist some extra furniture lying around the house
9. Sleep a lot
10. Go to the library and borrow some books and finish reading them
11. Hang a clock in every room
12. Watch episodes of "The Dewarists"

This may seem less, but trust me, after I sleep in late and nap in the afternoons, read in the mornings between the sleep schedule, watch episodes of "The Office" on Netflix, cook meals, blog and hang out with my got-the-10-day-break friends, there will be little time left to finish everything. But someone wisely said - Aim high. And so I will. (Also why this post is called - the eternal optimist)

Wish me luck!

As it turns out

I am not yet ready to let it go. Comments from you all (all 4 of you! :)) also made me think about it. And I came to the conclusion that, maybe I just need some change like changing the background color, or moving to wordpress or something like that! We'll see.

Thank you so much for your support guys.
@Rani - Special thanks to you, since I know it's not easy for you to comment on blogger.

Also it would be really unfair if I deleted my blog without acknowledging the award that it has got me. (yes, it's true!). But all that after I come back from my long cherry-blossom-ing weekend in Washington D.C.

See ya'll on the other side!

Wishing & Hoping & Praying

...for a happy conclusion. Don't want to be disappointed at the end of it all!